Son Of A....

Listen, I've been trying to blog now for like a week. At first I was convinced it was My crappy internet connection at work, but have since learned (as it is a Saturday and no one is here and my internet is working a-okay...) that Blogger's server ain't all it's cracked up to be and thus one blog per week...if I'm lucky and patient (took about ten minutes total for me to get to This page...).

So what have I missed?

Two Friday Fives...although they both kinda sucked so I'm not even gonna bother. I will however, stick to my original plan of creating My Own list of Five...so there:

Who?

1) If you could be born as someone of the opposite sex, who would you want to look like? Wow. Good question. I've often said that if i had to be a man, and could choose what I looked like, I'd probably pick David Beckham. That guy Looks good in Anything! Him or D'Angelo...

2) If you could have someone's job, who's would it be? Another excellent question. Do i want to change the world? Do I want to fulfill my own selfish needs and take over for Spielberg? Or do i just want to take the oppurtunity to do something cool? I'm gonna go with coolness...and Joan Lunden circa 1997. (Wha? Joan Lunden? You crack smoking, paint chip eatin'...) Hear me out...between 1996 and 2001 Joan Lunden was th ost of a show called "Behind Closed Doors". It was this show where Joan Lunden got to go and visit slash participate in odd and super cool jobs...like going through an FBI firing range, trying out ot be an astronaut, getting rides in various super cool vehicles by such outfits as Coast Guards, Air Force, etc. Justine and I used to watch the show and we swore that Joan Lunden had just landed the Coolest Job Ever. And I'm sticking by that opinion.

3) If you could have One Superhero's Super Powers, whose would it be? See, Friday Fives can only Dream about being this interesting...super powers, super powers....well I'm tempted to pick someone who has like a Bunch of superpowers, like Superman or....Superman...coem to think of it, unless I was some super cosmically awesome comic book hero, like the Silver Surfer, or Phoenix...actually, I think that sounds pretty frikkin' good. I'm picking the Silver Surfer...powers, Not life. Marvel heroes have always been way more complex than DC (Yes, I'm that much of a nerd! Shut Up!).

4) If you could marry someone else's spouse, whose would it be? Spouse? Hmmmm. Never thought of that. The lame duck of the question group I think, but can't complain....escpecially since i made them up...okay, well, I really dig Diane Lane, And Josh Brolin is married to her sooooo.....Josh Brolin!

5) If you could switch places and live someone else's life it would be:...Rock On.....Um....Do I have to look like them, or can I look like myself, 'cause then I'd pick...Sir Richard Branson. That guy rocks! And he does some really really cool rockstar stuff, and he could totally do whatver he prety much fancied at that moment....including even becoming a rock star or funding his own film. So i could do what I wanted!


Done and DONE!

Feel free to add you own answers if you like....

Woo HOO! Happy Halloween!

Friday Crap

Its all local

1. The time: This Friday Five Sucks

2. The weather: Seriously. Just what is the purpose of answering these questions?

3. The big news story: I mean, is it about provoking thought, 'cause I'm pretty sure the "time", "weather" and "biggest news story" aren't gonna do it, unless I get to actually discuss any of these things. So like, the North Korea thing...I could talk about that, but the question isn't "What do you Think of...", it's just "What is...". Lame.

4. Your favorite hangout: Maybe it's time for a regime change. A coup, if you will. Maybe a nice Friday Five round table of sorts. My suggestion, if you have five questions that might very well be interesting to answer and/or read, then please, feel free to either e-mail them or leave them in my comments. And then I will anser them, and maybe even pass them on to thoe I know who also answer these wonderful five-ish type lists. So, Kate.

5. The must-have accessory: iPod. I mean, come on.

have a good weekend!

Stuff

Politics, the Christian Right, procrastinating web surfing and maybe a little too much Daily Show and this is what makes me laugh. Enjoy:























And this...





(courtesy of www.sweetjesusihatebilloreilly.com) BOOYA!

Addendum

Amen.

Can You Say...Heaven?

Guess where I'm goin' tonight....oh yeah baby....goin' to see:




Oh yeah. oh yeaaaahhhhh.

Alt Punk Chicks doing a burlesque show, in a place that serves beer, with my super sexual girlfriend...this might, just might be my idea of heaven. Or at the very least, a nice belated birthday gift to myself....Woo Hoo!

I Love Republicans...

Two quick things here. First off, let me just say that I don't hate all Americans...or Republicans for that matter. No, I love them. In That "Jesus forgives everyone" kinda way (when he's not off being a mean drunk). But sometimes, I get terribly terribly amused slash annoyed at the ridiculous...things?...statements?....state of events?...south of the border.

So I'm listening to the news this morning and I hear that there have apparently been 25 shootings in schools already in this school year. And Americans are Up In Arms over this. I mean have there even been 25 school days yet? No one knows how to stop this, or what the next best step is to help keep their schools secure. Ideas are being thrown around...tougher security in schools, arming teachers, tougher sentencing on gun related offences...

Not once did I hear the mention of tougher gun control laws. Like that isn't even an option. 30,136 people died in the states in 2003 in gun related instances. But that didn't seem to phase the whole "but it's in our Constitution" crowd. And now, 25 shootings in less than a month of school. I guess us stupid non-Americans will never have the pleasure of saying that Americans don't ever overlook the obvious. If this wasn't a topic relating to a bunch of kids dying, then I'd say it would be laughable.

(Side Note: for all you "it's in the Constitution" dumbasses, I'd like to remind you that the Constitution was written back when women were chattle and men had to shoot "those darn injuns" off their land before they "raped their chilluns and cows". I'm pretty sure, I mean I may, just may, be wrong here, but I'm pretty sure that since then the United States has organized a...what is it called? Right! Police Force. And um, an Ar...My. But I guess it's better if we just arm everyone...I mean it Is their Right you know...and let the bullets land where they may...)

Second best thing I've heard today. Bill O'Reilly saying "the reason North Korea is causing trouble is that it wants to influence the November election. As we discussed last week, Iran's doing the same thing in Iraq -- ramping up the violence so Americans will turn against the Bush administration."

Yeah, that's it, North Koreans have developed, and tested, Nuclear Weapons for the sole purpose of getting George Bush out of office. I believe that would officially be taking a hobby too far.

I used to think Bill O'Reilly was just a dink. Now I think he's a retarded dink. Seriously.

Friday Five Before Michigan

Mush

1) Name one of your bad habits:
Well, I'm pretty much chronically late. Or as Kate puts it, "is that in Real time, or Lenita time?". So even though I say it will take me fifteen minutes to get ready (which I truly truly believe it will take), it usually ends up being closer to...a half hour?

2) What do you expect from friends?
Respect. And don't argue with me about music. Friendly debate though, That I welcome.

3) What is the last thing you wrote down?
You mean other than this?

4) What is the last favor you did for someone else?
I do everyone a favor when I hang out with them...HAHAHA...okay I'm kidding. I don't know...gave someone a lift? Lifted something heavy for someone? Didn't kick them in the teeth when they made fun of me?

5) What is your favorite TV show?
Right now I most look forward to Studio 60 (please watch it...it's goooood) and (blush) Survivor...


Heading to Michigan this weekend, to visit the older brother and his brood. Looking forward to the road trip, with my bro and my baby by my side. We'll arm the troops, rally the masses, cut through the country side and lick freedom. Maybe hit some Americn stores, some American food places, maybe go buy some American beer in an American grocery store (at least That they got right). The long arm of complacency can't get me now, I'm hittin' the road!

Anoter Week, Another Year Older

So Festivus has come to an end. Good times were had, some yelling was done, certain memories were blocked (by choice and not...) and for the most part, it was all smiles. In the end, I am left with:

- Vague memories of having good, albeit short, conversations with a bunch of my friends
- A sense that time really does fly when you're having fun...I honestly feel like the party portion happened in ten mintues
- A new tattoo, my best work so far, and a excellent birthday gift from my beloved
- the yearning to rewind time and try Saturday out again so that i could talk to More people before they left
- About four extra pounds of beer floating around in my body

I guess I was so looking forward to the weekend, that once it was there, and then gone, I really did get a sense of loss, like I would have to wait another year for this brilliant opputrtunity, with all my friends, in one place, dancing and having a good time, to happen again.

So if someone could just hurry up and have another birthday, but invite all my friends to it, that would be awesome. Anyone?

P.S. Shouts out to those who made it happen, and to those who travelled to attend. Kate, thanks for tending to me all weekend, and Sarah, happy frikkin' 30th biatch!