Festivus Friday Five!

Broken.

1. What's the last thing you broke?
Who cares! It's Festivus!

2. What's the most expensive thing you've broken?
My Diamond Festivus Thingy. Okay I'm lying, but that's 'cause it's Festivus and I can!

3. Do you consider yourself clumsy or graceful?
I dance (during Festivus celebrations) like a swan, while Crackin' Skulls Festivus Style!

4. How much money do you have in your wallet right now?
Alot! Why? 'Cause it's Festivus and i Need It! For my Festivus Tattoo!

5. Someone asks for change while you're walking down the street -- what do you do?
When it's Festivus? Whatever I want!

IT'S FESTIVUS!!!!!

Did I mention it's Festivus? Seven days of celebration. Seven days of remembering the best day ever, the day i was brought into this world. So raise a glass! Or three! Or eight! And let's kick it off Festivus style! 'Cause if you can't celebrate your own birth...well there' always Christmas.

Twiddle twiddle twiddle

So it's a Saturday, and I'm at work, slightly bored, slightly itchy, slightly wishing I Was at home, stoned, maybe playing video games, maybe cleaning my apartment. My boss called me in today, mainly so that I could grab an extra day of cash on my next paycheck. Kind fellow that he is. He was here earlier, but then left to do, well, things. Leaving me to my own devices....which essentially means sitting here, doin' a whole lot of nothing.

I've already spent a couple of hours mucking around with Garageband. It's just so tedious to get my ideas out with this program...in an ideal world, I'd have some awesomelly trained studio musicians who I could just hum stuff to and get them to play it. With garage band, by the time I've fixed just One track, I forget where I wanted the song to go in the first place. Ah well...I still consider it time well spent...

But with the tedium growing old, I find myself staring at things alot. Or googling "bored" and finding the cartoon above. I've read the blogs, I've typed some e-mail, and now? Now I waste a hour thinking about lunch and waiting to hear from my illustrious leader.

Tonight I'm going to a BBQ at one of Kate's friends houses. I've already been told to be on my best behaviour. Which is a total buzzkill (kidding sweetie...I love behaving). Should be alright. And then after, it's off to a gathering of kind folk at Not My Dog. Really, this night could be a good time all around. Hopefully so. 'Cause I'm clinging to the idea that this day will pick up momentum soon....please......

In the meantime...about that lunch thing............

Friday Five

Just the facts, ma'am

1. Where were you last night?
......heh heh heh......

2. Did you speak with anyone?
yes, there was some talking involved...

3. What were you wearing?
......heh heh heh......

4. What did you eat or drink?
eat? heh heh heh...okay there was some frozen pizzas at one point, and some cookies...and then a couple of beers....

5. Can anyone verify your whereabouts from midnight to 5am?
yes.


That was my answer....sometimes I read other poeple's answers on the Actual friday Five site. Came across this guy's (http://blackpaladin.livejournal.com/) answer, it made me giggle, so now I share with you:

1. Where were you last night?
Nowhere special...

2. Did you speak with anyone?
Why, what have you heard?

3. What were you wearing?
I swear, officer, she said she was 18...

4. What did you eat or drink?
I had a drink of something a man in an alley gave me. It was marked "Formula HJ-7;" is that bad??

5. Can anyone verify your whereabouts from midnight to 5am?
Do the voices in my head count... they told me if I put the pretty girl in the box she'd stay mine forever...

giggle giggle giggle <- that's me giggling btw...

right then.


Playing poker tonight, very excited. And then some BBQing and hopefully dancing tomorrow. And then next week, the celebration of the nation!!!!....birthday styyyyyle....let the Festivus Begin!

This is Emily-Kate

Lookit her...all happy with her two ice cream cones. She'd eat 'em both too, if you let her. Smiley puss. Happy face. Sugar monster. Lovely ain't she?

Boys Night Out...Girls Sleep In

So we had one of our infamous (to me at least) boys nights out on Saturday. Started nicely, with drinks at my place. had the lovely Raquel and her husband over and then the girls slash "my boys" showed up and we "prepped" for the main event. Unfortunately the "prepping" had us leaving my place at minutes before midnight.

Got to the Drake for like 12:45, after a lovely stroll through the back alleys of Parkdale...they should do tours through there; we ended up passing a guy throwing up (being held up by his friends...one of which I recognized from work), an angry drug deal, and exited the alley amidst some street dregs, a couple of which Justine was so nice as to give the remnants of our travelling beers. I think they were happy about it...wasn't really paying attention.

So we get to the Drake, and we have to line up for the 1:00 am opening of the underground. Somehow, after waiting maybe fifteen minutes, one of us talks to the door guy and the five of us are lead through the line up and in the club. Once again, wasn't paying attention so I have no idea how that happened. I guess I Did end up being more of a tourist that night, since I obviously was not focusing on actions and reactions around me.

Once in, we got beers (and one rye and coke for my babe) and dacned our little shtukasses off (pronounced sh-took-us). Justine quickly made friends with a bunch of strangers, some bald drunk guy hovered and tried some oh so subtle dance with me moves on some of our girls, Kelly got offered some tongue action (but not by her not present girl...way to go Hearnsie) and I danced with my girl and kept the beer flowing into my belly.

At 4:30, the club kicked us out and we were invited to continue at one of Justine's new friends crash pad (he was from L.A. and staying with friends...who I'm sure would have been so happy to learn he had invited, like, ten strangers to their home). But alas, I was promised and Had promised some nookie, so the girls slash "my boys" went their way, and I took my lady home for some interactive cuddling.

Fell asleep as the skies turned light blue and the birds began their morning rants.

All in all, not a bad night. Very grateful for plans not broken, and happy to be dancing with friends and Kate. And once again I got to remind myself that age ain't nothing but a number baby....(of course I Did sleep in until arooouuuund 4 in the afternoon).

Two weeks, and it all repeats itself, except it'll be called Turner and Lenita's Birthday!

Woo hoo!

Friday Five

It's like candy, but with blood. Which is so much better!


1. How much TV do you watch?
Lots. And lots and lots and lots. I love it love it love it. I plan schedules around it.

2. What type of show is your favorite?
Do I have to pick one? Can't I just say drama slash reality TV slash comedy slash HBO Showtime awesomeness?

3. Which talk show host do you hate?
Dr. Phil. Self Righteous Bastard.

4. Are you looking forward to any new season premieres?
Are you Kidding? All of them! Survivor last was awesome. The Apprentice and Amazing Race, My Name is Earl, a bunch of the new ones, like Shark, or Brother and Sisters, or Studio 60 for sure. And once I get a schedule set up, then that will detrmine which ones I keep watching.

5. Which show is your guilty pleasure?
Are you Kidding? All of them! It's TV for the love of...It's Never time Well Spent.

Have a Good Weekend, and welcome to the Fall Season!

What the HELL!

Just got word that Carolyn Kepcher is being replaced! Who is Carolyn Kepcher you may be asking?



Only the best damn thing about the Apprentice. Apparently "The Donald" is replacing her with his own daughter. You know, nepotism aside, I've seen his daughter in action, and she ain't no Carolyn. Heck, she's barely a robot with a pulse.

So this is the worst TV news I've heard since the whole Arrested Development not being picked up thing. Curse you Donald!

Carolyn, I'll miss ya...


FYI Section

Top 5 TV Tragedies

5) Carolyn being replaced - See Above

4) The Last Family Ties - Watching Alex hug everyone good-bye, knowing there would be no more anagrammed executive items, and no more career for Tina Yothers, well it was enough to make me cry.

3) Arrested Development No Longer - What the hell is wrong with the world when Full House can last 8 seasons (8 SEASONS!), and Arrested Development, the best written comedy in years (honourable mention going to My Name is Earl), can't make it to the end of it's third.

2) Mention of Detective Benson's "boyfriends" - Law and Order SVU has always been my fave Law and Order. No doubt. But the day that I watched it high and started noticing slash imagining that Detective Olivia Benson was a gaymo, it got super better. The next fourteen times I watched it, I had myself, and my roommates, convinced that they were making her into a lesbian - with the overly protective stance she took towards female victims, the way she looks at the asst. D.A, especially when she was saying good-bye to the one who went into the witness protection program (they might as well have made out), and the weird "jealousy" sub-plot they had with the Mary Stuart Masterson guest role, she was totally on her way to being outed...until they decided to have Elliott casually "mention" her boyfriends. And then they went and gave her actual guy love interests! Way to ruin a good fantasy....

1) All Joss Whedon shows being pulled or ended and therefore off the air - I know this technically counts as three injustices, since there were three different shows, but really, Joss is an enigma (so much so that all his fans seem to always refer to him by first name...liek he's your pal) and all his items should be lumped into one "Jossverse"...that for some reason is no longer on TV. Big mistake TV universe. His shows actually contained something that 98% of shows on regular cable lack these days - substance. And without sacrificing entertainment value. Let's see the Tanners pull that off, oh, ever.

My TV emotions cry for all these TV tragedies....ohp, time to pee, commercial break.

See This Movie...

Went to see some film fest movies this weekend. Friday saw a cool Finnish-Chinese-Estonian film called JADE WARRIOR. Worth the watch, nicely shot but left a bunch of questions unanswered in my head. I liked it, good pick all around. But then Saturday, I went and saw...



SUMMERCAMP!

A documentary about kids at summercamp. I laughed, I cried, and I left feeling like a million bucks. See this film. Hands down, no doubt about it.

P.S. Also saw Rogue Wave perform at Lee's Palace. Also worth the ticket price. Good show, good sound, see them if you get the chance. Honourable mention to the openers, Foreign Born and The Grate. And also to my girl, for being an excellent date. All in all a pleasurable and sensoraly pleasing weekend.

Friday Five

Doused in mud

1. When is the last time you dressed inappropriately for a situation?
Everyday. My everyday uniform usually consist of jeans and a shirt that I've ripped the sleeves off of. Now you tell me, other than on a stage worn by a rockstar, were is this sort of attire appropriate? (and yes I am a rock star in waiting)

2. How many friends do you have?
None. But lots and lots of enemies and I keep them veeeerrrrryyyyy close.

3. Are you running on time today?
No.

4. Do you use bleach on your laundry?
No.

5. What are your thoughts on guns?
I would like to shoot some someday (beyond the .22 rifles I used to shoot as a girl guide). But all in all, I think the world would probably be a much better place if all firearms and explosive projectile weaponry was eliminated. Let's bring it back old school, when men fought with swords and stormed castles. YA!


And that brings me into the weekend. Going to see some film fest films, and a concert. Maybe I'll run into you, any of you "friends" of mine. I'm on to you, all of you. Moo-ah ha ha ha!....I sleep with one eye open. Like this guy...

Let's go to the Ex - hibition of Trash!

So went to the CNE this weekend. Good times all around. Did you know that people actually make sculptures out of butter? Who knew?

i'm always amazed by the Ex. It's like the haven for everything trashy...like a super-sized version of the "Wel-Fair". And yet it's packed! Packed! Not just with trashy people...with every type of person that you may find in and around the Toronto area. I mean think about it. this is the kind of place that Invented carnies. And no one looks odd being here.

When I lived in Scarborough, and the Wel-fair used to come around, you knew the people that stood out. Hell, I stood out...'cause I had teeth. And didn't look like I had killed someone before coming to ride the Zipper.

But this place...it's awesome. kate and i smoked a joint, walked to it, and then just absorbed the trash assault to the senses with glee. and we ate....boy did we eat...trash. (in order) we ate a cabbage roll, perogies, a caramel apple, Tiny Tom donuts, foot long corn dog, and fudge. The line-up for the funnel cake was just stupid - the line-ups for everything by this point were ridiculous - and so with a promise to catch Wonderland (and funnel cake...and yes babe, the Polar Express) before it closed for the season, we ended our visit to trashland and made the trek home...finishing the night off with a Big Mac meal. i mean what are long weekends for if you can't abuse your body?

Sometimes I hate the Internet...

Like a drug, I'm craaaaaving good internet connection. it took me 9 minutes for this page to load. That would be like reading this sentence oh, 54 times?

That being said, here' the Friday Five:


Friday Fill-In

1. When I'm angry, I ____ Punch things. Not people though, just things. But that could change at aaaany moment.

2. The first time I ____ I also ____ The first time I Smoked hash, I also listened to Dark Side Of The Moon from beginning to end. And then moved on to the Moody Blues.

3. I was born in ____ I Was Born in a Manger, Died in the Saddle, and Came Back as a Horny Toad. Okay not really, but isn't that the best book title you ever heard?

4. My favorite ____ is ____ My favorite impromptu activity usually involves 60 minutes, nudity, and my girlfriend. And Then we Really get cookin'......

have a good long weekend!

5 I laughed so hard when ____